Can I be autistic and not know it?
Yes, it is possible to be autistic and not know it. Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) affects individuals in unique and diverse ways, and for many people, particularly those with mild autism or who were born before autism became widely understood, their autistic traits may have gone unrecognized or misinterpreted. Some people live much of their lives unaware that they are autistic, attributing their unique ways of thinking, feeling, and interacting to personality traits, social anxiety, or other factors. Discovering later in life that you are autistic can be enlightening and validating, offering explanations for lifelong experiences and struggles.
Here are some reasons why you might be autistic and not know it, along with signs to help identify autism in adulthood.
1. Autism Is a Spectrum
One reason someone may not realize they are autistic is that autism exists on a spectrum, encompassing a broad range of behaviors and characteristics. Some individuals may have traits that are subtle or “mild” and therefore don’t fit the stereotypical image of autism. High-functioning individuals or those with mild autism may manage to meet social expectations, hold jobs, and navigate relationships, even though they may struggle internally or feel different from others.
2. Masking or Camouflaging Behaviors
Many autistic individuals, especially those diagnosed later in life, have learned to mask or camouflage their autistic traits. Masking involves consciously or unconsciously adopting behaviors to blend in socially, such as mimicking facial expressions, forcing eye contact, or using scripted conversations to navigate social situations. While masking can help individuals fit in, it can also be exhausting and may lead to burnout. People who mask often remain unaware that their need to “act” is tied to autism, as they have adapted to social pressures rather than recognizing it as neurodivergence.
3. Limited Awareness or Access to Information
In recent decades, understanding and awareness of autism have grown significantly. However, adults who grew up before autism was widely understood may not have had access to the resources, language, or diagnostic tools we have today. Consequently, they may not realize that their experiences align with autism traits.
Some individuals, particularly women and nonbinary people, have been historically overlooked in autism diagnoses, as earlier diagnostic criteria were often based on traits more commonly seen in males. This gap in understanding can lead to undiagnosed autism, even in adulthood.
4. High Functioning and Subtle Signs
Individuals who are “high-functioning” or have milder forms of autism may navigate life without severe disruptions, though they still experience unique challenges. They may struggle with things like social nuances, sensory sensitivities, or maintaining routines but find ways to cope or hide these difficulties. Because they can manage independently or keep their challenges private, their autism may go unnoticed, even by close family or friends.
5. Misinterpretation of Symptoms as Other Conditions
Autistic traits often overlap with other conditions, leading to misdiagnoses or self-attributions that don’t account for the full picture. Many autistic individuals, for instance, may be diagnosed with social anxiety, ADHD, or even depression, while their autism goes unrecognized. While these conditions can co-occur with autism, misinterpreting the underlying autistic traits can delay an accurate diagnosis. For example, trouble with executive functioning, intense focus on interests, or a preference for routine might be misinterpreted as anxiety or OCD.
6. Difficulty in Recognizing Traits in Oneself
Because autism is an internalized experience for many, it can be hard to identify in oneself. You might have become so accustomed to certain routines, preferences, and ways of processing the world that these traits feel like personality quirks rather than signs of autism. Reflecting on childhood experiences or asking family members about early behaviors can sometimes reveal signs that went unrecognized in the past.
Signs You Might Be Autistic Without Knowing It
If you’re wondering whether you might be autistic, here are some traits that can appear in adults with undiagnosed autism. Keep in mind that everyone is different, and having some of these traits does not necessarily mean you are autistic.
1. Social Challenges
- Feeling out of sync with social norms or struggling to fit in
- Finding it hard to understand social cues, sarcasm, or humor
- Discomfort with small talk or preference for meaningful conversations
- Difficulty making or maintaining friendships or relationships
2. Sensory Sensitivities
- Being easily overwhelmed by bright lights, loud noises, certain textures, or smells
- Finding comfort in specific sensory inputs (e.g., soft fabrics, repetitive sounds)
- Avoiding crowded or noisy environments
3. Intense Interests or Hobbies
- Developing a deep, often exhaustive focus on specific interests or topics
- Spending hours researching or engaging in a particular hobby or subject
- Enjoying repetitive activities or routines that bring comfort and familiarity
4. Routines and Predictability
- Feeling stressed or anxious with changes in routine or unexpected events
- Having a strong preference for predictability and structure in daily life
- Difficulty adapting to new situations, like moving or changing jobs
5. Challenges with Executive Functioning
- Struggling with time management, organization, or completing tasks
- Finding it hard to transition between activities or tasks
- Relying heavily on reminders, lists, or routines to stay organized
6. Emotional Regulation Difficulties
- Experiencing intense emotions that feel hard to control or express
- Having meltdowns (outward emotional outbursts) or shutdowns (withdrawing or going silent) in overwhelming situations
- Difficulty understanding or expressing your own emotions
7. Preference for Solitude
- Feeling more comfortable alone or in small groups rather than large gatherings
- Needing time alone to recharge after social interactions
- Preferring solitary hobbies or activities
Table: Common Signs of Undiagnosed Autism in Adults
| Sign | Description |
|---|---|
| Social Challenges | Difficulty with social norms, understanding sarcasm, small talk, maintaining friendships |
| Sensory Sensitivities | Discomfort with bright lights, loud sounds, specific textures, and crowded spaces |
| Intense Interests | Deep focus on hobbies or topics, spending extended time on specific interests |
| Need for Routine | Preference for predictable routines, stress with sudden changes |
| Executive Functioning Challenges | Struggles with organization, time management, transitioning tasks |
| Emotional Regulation | Intense emotions, difficulty expressing feelings, meltdowns, shutdowns |
| Preference for Solitude | Comfort in being alone, need to recharge after socializing |
How Can an Autism Diagnosis Help in Adulthood?
Discovering that you’re autistic can be a transformative experience. Many people find that a diagnosis helps them make sense of a lifetime of feeling “different.” Here are some benefits of pursuing an autism diagnosis in adulthood:
- Self-understanding: Understanding that you’re autistic can help you make sense of your preferences, behaviors, and social experiences, allowing for greater self-acceptance.
- Access to resources and accommodations: A diagnosis may qualify you for accommodations in work or educational settings, helping you manage sensory or social challenges more effectively.
- Support communities: Many adults with late diagnoses find a sense of belonging in the autism community, where they can share experiences and insights with others who understand.
- Mental health benefits: Knowing you’re autistic can reduce feelings of isolation, frustration, or confusion, as well as minimize the impact of masking behaviors and potential burnout.
Frequently Asked Questions
Can you be autistic and not realize it?
Yes, many people go undiagnosed into adulthood, especially if they have mild autism or learned to mask their traits. Limited awareness and historical biases in diagnostic criteria have contributed to late diagnoses, particularly for women and nonbinary individuals.
What’s the benefit of getting an autism diagnosis as an adult?
An adult diagnosis can provide valuable insights, self-acceptance, and access to support. It allows individuals to understand their unique traits and connect with resources and communities that can improve their quality of life.
How do I get assessed for autism as an adult?
You can seek an autism assessment through a licensed psychologist, psychiatrist, or developmental specialist. The assessment may include interviews, questionnaires, and a review of your developmental history to determine if your experiences align with autism traits.
Is it common to be misdiagnosed before receiving an autism diagnosis?
Yes, many autistic individuals receive misdiagnoses, often of anxiety, depression, ADHD, or OCD. These conditions can overlap with autism or be symptoms of it, making it important to seek a comprehensive evaluation.
Can knowing I’m autistic help with my mental health?
For many, an autism diagnosis leads to improved mental health. Understanding that you’re autistic can validate your experiences, reduce self-blame, and help you develop coping strategies aligned with your unique needs.
Final Thoughts
Yes, it’s entirely possible to be autistic and not know it. Understanding autism as an adult can offer explanations for experiences you may have struggled to understand, from social challenges to sensory sensitivities and strong routines. If these traits resonate with you, exploring an autism diagnosis can be a meaningful step toward self-discovery and acceptance. Whether or not you pursue a formal diagnosis, recognizing and understanding these traits can help you build a life that honors your unique neurodiversity, supports your needs, and allows you to thrive.
